it smells so sweet outside today.
the sun smiles down, i'm in the shade.
i sit and think about all my friends and how good they are.
but when today is yesterday, i know that things won't stay the same
but i know that the memories won't go to far.

round and round the world will turn. 
lessons taught and lessons learned.
jesus gets us through the good and bad times. 
and lets us know that everything will be just fine. 

a year's passsed since i wrote this song. 
a lot's gone right, a lot's gone wrong.
but i know that jesus has been there right by my side.
and i see the sun still shines. 
it shines outside and in my life, 
and i know that everything is gonna be just fine.

Quote of the day

All the windows,
Swear to miss you,
And the doors are cell block tight,
Sweet sedation,
Sweep the issues,
And the clocks about to strike
Did it call you down,
Are you back just yet,
Waiting now please come set me free,
And the only sound is a minute left.
Its 11:11 pm..and i miss you

                           *All American Rejects

Fallout boy, All american rejects, hawthorne heights concert anyone?! i get to go with the most handsome guy ever..ExCiTeD!

Studying time...Much

I love you Travis James!

goodbye goodbye goodbye..i hate that word!! i hate it soo much! why do i have to say goodbye? I love seeing my family..i absolutly LOVE it..they are who i am..they have shaped me into who i am today..wisconsin..everythign about it..i just love..so i get to spend time with them..and i am so happy in the moment..only to have them ripped away..gone again..back to normal..facing reality..why cant i have it all at once..why cant i have wisconsin and my family..and here?! i am one person, living in two places...

christmas..spending time with travs family was incredible..he has the most amazing family and i love them all so much..not only do i love the boy SOO much..i dont even no how its possible..but i also have fallen in love with his family..they made me mis smy own..

all laughs..all smiles and jokes..

dinner with my aunt uncle and cousin...we talked of home..and they told us how grandpa isnt doing too well..he still has his sense of humor..cuz boy is that man a joker!! but each day he is fading..

And I Wasnt There..I havent been there for 9 years!

when grandpa is gone, so his grandma..there bond is sooo amazing..they honestly and sincerly just cannot live without eachother..that is the love that i will expect..that is the love that i will accept nothing less than..because that is what i have grown up with and that is what it should be..for better or for worse..they are by far the best people..i have ever known..all of the fenske family..

i should be happy..i should feel so content..to even have such this huge awesome family..and i shouldnt keep thinking of all the bad..

but i just cant help it..and im writing in here..for the first time in a long time..just to let it out..

if there is one thing that completely tears me up inside..is saying goodbye to my family..because with them..i fit..everything feels so right..just as it did wen i was a little girl..but in may! we are going out for my closest cousin's wedding..we really do grow up way too fast!

im done ranting now..lol

and i get to go to a concert to see one of my favorite bands..with the guy who has made all my dreams come true..